Seriously? A Cow?
Let’s just pause for a moment, shall we? Let’s take a deep breath and collectively acknowledge that we are living in a world where schools are put on lockdown… by a cow. A cow. I mean, come on! Were battling global pandemics, political upheaval, the existential dread of climate change, and what do we get? A bovine blockade disrupting education.
Apparently, this escaped ruminant decided it would be a brilliant idea to wander onto school grounds in Nebraska, necessitating a full-blown lockdown. Because, obviously, that’s the logical response. I imagine the principal was thrilled – another item for the never-ending list of things I didnt sign up for.
And you know what? I bet someone somewhere is writing a think piece about “the symbolic significance of this event.” As if a loose cow isnt just…a loose cow. It’s an animal, it wandered off, people were mildly inconvenienced, and now we have a story that will be told with weary amusement for years to come.
I’m not even mad. Im just… deeply, profoundly disappointed in the universe. We had so much potential! So many possibilities! And instead, we get a cow. A cow, people.
