The End of Everything, Apparently: A 12-Year-Old and Fusion
Right. Another day, another headline screaming about how were all being rendered obsolete by pre-teens. Because apparently, mastering nuclear fusion – you know, the thing that powers the sun – is just a hobby now, something to do between Fortnite matches and perfecting your TikTok dance. A 12-year-old in Dallas. Seriously?
I’m supposed to feel impressed? Im supposed to celebrate while I struggle to remember where I put my keys and this kid is apparently splitting atoms in his garage? It’s fantastic, truly. Let’s all bow down before the future overlords who peaked at age twelve, because clearly, adulthood is just a downward spiral from peak genius.
I bet he’s already designing self-folding laundry too, isnt he? And probably solving world hunger while we’re at it. It’s not about celebrating achievement; its about the creeping dread of knowing that my entire skillset – years spent acquiring…things… is now utterly worthless because a child with access to YouTube and a soldering iron has surpassed me in scientific accomplishment.
Just wonderful. Pass the tissues, I need to go contemplate my existential irrelevance. Someone please tell me theres still room for people who can’t build miniature stars.
