The Rabbit Situation: Because Apparently, Were All That Entertaining
Honestly? A friendly rabbit in a ski resort town is news now? Seriously? Are we scraping the bottom of the barrel for content so desperately that a bunny attempting to infiltrate personal vehicles qualifies as a headline? I’m just… baffled.
And then the authorities chime in, bless their hearts, with their profound pronouncements: “It’s not an escaped pet.” Well, gosh, thanks for clearing that up. We were all picturing some pampered fluffball, yearning for freedom from its velvet-lined hutch, when it turns out its just… a wild rabbit being a rabbit. What groundbreaking investigative journalism!
I mean, rabbits do things. They hop. They eat things. Occasionally they try to get into cars because maybe, just maybe, they’re curious about the giant metal boxes that dominate their habitat? Is that so shocking? Apparently, it is. It necessitates an official statement. A reassurance to terrified tourists.
This entire situation perfectly encapsulates the absurdity of our modern world. We manufacture crises from crumbs, and then congratulate ourselves for solving them. A rabbit wants a closer look at your Subaru? The end of civilization as we know it! Someone get me my fainting couch.
