Seriously? A Cat Burglar Stealing Underwear?!
Right, let’s just unpack this for a moment. I need a lie down. Apparently, someone – and I use the term someone loosely, because it turns out to be an actual cat – has been pilfering underwear from a New Zealand school for over a YEAR? A year! How is that even possible? Did nobody notice a fluffy fiend absconding with briefs and boxers? Were they all too busy staring at sheep or something?
And the sheer audacity of it all! Not jewelry, not artwork, not even cash. Underwear. Honestly, what kind of depraved hobby involves accumulating stolen underpants? Is this some elaborate performance art piece Im completely missing? Does this feline felon have a secret collection he’s planning to showcase at a tiny, underground exhibition?
I bet the school is just thrilled, isnt it? Yes, we pride ourselves on our rigorous security measures. Just ignore the fact that a cat has been waltzing around stealing everyones delicates for over twelve months. This is peak ridiculousness. I fully expect to wake up and discover squirrels are now holding board meetings at Parliament. The world has officially lost it. At least someone caught it on video, though. A literal cat burglar. You just can’t make this stuff up.
