The Unmitigated Glory of Random Chance (and My Lunch Break)
Seriously? A Maryland man? $50,000? Because he decided to partake in the utterly essential activity of consuming a midday meal? This is precisely the sort of news that makes one question the very fabric of reality. Like, congratulations, sir, on your astounding luck! I’m absolutely thrilled for you. Truly. Its just…peak absurdity.
We toil away, meticulously budgeting, sacrificing avocado toast, and diligently saving for a rainy day. And what happens? Some fellow casually buys a lottery ticket while grabbing a sandwich – because obviously that’s the most productive use of one’s time– and suddenly he’s sitting on fifty grand.
Dont misunderstand. I don’t begrudge him his windfall, not really. It’s just…the sheer randomness! The utter lack of effort required! All that hard work, all those responsible choices, seemingly rendered utterly meaningless by the whim of a scratch-off.
It’s enough to make one want to throw their meticulously planned retirement portfolio out the window and invest solely in deli meats and instant win games. Probably not, but the thought is briefly appealing. Just…a little bit. Now if youll excuse me, I need to re-evaluate my entire existence.
